30 Letters in 30 Days: Day Seventeen- Someone from my childhood

Deeny,

          I still can’t believe that you are that geeky girl I met in first grade, with the Sally Jesse glasses that took up about 70% of your face. You were young, innocent, sweet, and just plain good. You were a good person. I will never forget your dad dying when we were only seven years old. He was a great guy and I know how much you loved him. I imagine your childhood would have been a lot better if he had made it, he was always the one to balance out your mom. Maybe we’d still be friends if he had lived. I guess we’ll never know though.

          Despite how close we were when we were kids up through high school, I will never forgive you for what you did to Tyler. You went from being an amazing girl to a female version of John; lying to Tyler and cheating on him and treating him like shit. You treated me like shit too, and I know why. Tyler told me how you were jealous of the way I could calm him down when his anger got the best of him, the way his teachers pulled me out of class to help him, the way they let me walk around outside the school for a full class period because I was the only one who could get him from blank stares, shaking, and about to punch everyone in arms length, back to happy pleasant Tyler. If it was anyone but you and me I’d understand the jealousy, but we’d been friends since we were six! That was over a decade of friendship and you couldn’t trust me with your boyfriend? Me: the girl who had never stolen a guy? Me: the girl who was dating his best friend/cousin? That hurts. I always wanted you guys to get married.

          What you did made him my best friend. By putting him through the same thing John was putting me through at the same time you forged a bond that held strong. By alienating me (I think because you felt guilty about what you were doing, but that’s just a guess) you weakened our friendship to the point of breaking. You can’t blame me for ignoring your random phone calls, sometime months apart. You ruined it. You had been one of my best friends since I was six, at eighteen you started breaking it apart, now, at twenty I can’t remember the last time we spoke. I find that sad, almost as sad as the fact that I don’t care when we talk next.

-me